Reflections on 2011: The Wedding
On New Year’s Eve, I was scrolling through Tweets of my sisters’ because it’s the most effective way to find out what’s going on with them back in the USA. Madeline tweeted something about it being a big year, with graduation, jobs, weddings, and I thought that my 2011 deserved some reflection as well. Because I suck at tweeting, I’m blogging about it instead.
In 2011, I got married, quit my first job, and moved to a foreign country. Let’s begin with the wedding, because it consumed my life for most of 2011. I married the love of my life on July 29, 2011. Only now can I appreciate the true significance of a wedding (love, duh) because everyday leading up to July 29 and for some days afterward, all I thought about was wedding details: opalescent invitation paper, wishing trees, braided hairstyles, robin’s egg blue, and Jimmy Choos for example. Even though I didn’t want an extravagant, showy wedding, I did want my wedding to be stylish, personal, and hip, to an extent. I wanted it to be different and special and I wanted my guests to leave thinking, ” Wow, I’ve never seen/done/experienced that at a wedding before!” It was as if my wedding was part of some competition- by the way, your wedding can really be part of a competition with TLC’s “Four Weddings”. So, every detail was thought about 10 times over. Add other people’s feelings into the mix, because other’s will have an opinion about your wedding, and you have a delicious recipe for a rollercoaster ride of stress. If you want details: read this article, I don’t feel presumptuous saying it’s true for everyone.
The wedding itself went down without a hitch (well maybe except for the hook-up in the country club fitness center and stolen bowling trophies). It rained the morning of the wedding, and I thought I’d truly lose it, but it cleared up during the ceremony, and now I have gorgeous rainy and sunny photographs. I didn’t faint during the ceremony, which I was afraid of and we danced our first dance basically correctly. The band was a blast, people danced, and the surprise bowling at midnight was a hit. Plus the events around the wedding were incredible. You’d think you were at the premiere for “Claire & Alexander” for how many times our names appeared on different surfaces at the rehearsal dinner. And people talked about the spread at the Day After Brunch for days. In wedding blogs, brides usually write a “regrets” post, a reflection on what they’d do over. I wouldn’t do anything over. Our wedding was perfect, every wedding is.
I believe it is inevitable that when you put in so much work and emotions into a one day event, you’ll feel let down afterward. I did. As we walked down the hotel hallway to our suite for the after-party, I cried. When Alex asked me why, I said, “because it’s over.” Unfortunately, I held onto that emotion for a while. After devoting my every thought to the wedding, when it was over, I just didn’t know what to think about anymore.
A wedding is not really about flowers or prime rib vs. chicken, receiving lines or place card fonts. I don’t remember every detail of my wedding day, but what I do remember clearly is when Alex and I exchanged vows. Alex went first so that I wouldn’t be nervous, but it turns out he was the nervous one, and quietly stumbled through his vows. As he was saying his vows I thought, “hey, that’s what I was going to say,” because Alex’s vows were so similar to my own in sentiment and even vocabulary. It was then that I finally relaxed and when it was my turn to say my vows, I didn’t stutter at all, I was actually almost laughing. That’s what a wedding is really about.
